"We come to a place and make it a desert, and this we call peace."
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Had a death in the family. My wife's only brother. I'm not sure why I qualify him that way but it seems the natural thing to say. Chuck was a good guy and I liked him because he seemed to like me. He wasn't a saint by any means, and lived a very hard life for the first half but he got pretty close to being right for the second half. So, I give him his due and thank him for the time he spent here and what he did in that time. I have always had a problem with grief, the problem being that my father beat the whole grief thing outta me as a child. Good training for my years as a soldier but piss poor for my years as a human being, father and husband. People cry and I get confused. Why do they cry, tears will change nothing, but that doesn't seem to stop them. I think it brings a release, a release from the pain. I used to wonder where my release was, but I think I have been given a gift of sorts. When they cry they need someone to watch over them, to do the laundry and shopping and cooking and make the calls they hate to make, I am that someone. So I'll hug them and bring them food and nod when they weep because that's what I do. I've got your back. So I'll grieve in my own way and say, thanks Chuck, you were a good brother in law, I am truly glad to have known you. Now I have to run to the commissary buts it ok because dinner will be one of my best recipes.